Stupidity Doesn't Have a Limit

As a small child I used to go to the grocery with my mom. There was a brown coin-op riding horse in the front of the store that I ALWAYS wanted to ride. My mom wouldn't let me, saying it was a waste of money, and usually throwing in some mention of the gum she just bought (as though my minuscule attention span could be satisfied with something that happened five minutes ago). One day, most likely after I threw a bratty fit, she let me ride the horse. I climbed atop his leather saddle, put my feet in the stirrups and awaited a great adventure with my trusty hooved companion. Mom inserted the quarter. About a minute later I couldn't figure out why I made such a big deal. It was an idealistic dream that would never be the same again. My innocence lost, I grew into adulthood and assumed my role in society and found a job. In a roll of quarters there are forty rides. It's time for my gainful employment to bankroll me in making up for lost time....